Tag Archives: family

When is enough enough?

Posted by on

We are all asking when is it enough? Parents of young children are struggling with how to talk to their children, how to keep them safe. The mass shootings in Buffalo and Uvalde are the latest horrific examples of gun violence and hate in this country.

I have been struggling to find the right words. There are none. Yes, thoughts and prayers for all the victims, their families, and communities are needed. May they find the strength to carry on in the very difficult days ahead. But what’s needed in this country is action and policy change, not just more thoughts and prayers.

I read two pieces that have helped me to express what I’m feeling.

Michael Dowling, President and CEO of Northwell Health, is a progressive voice amongst healthcare executives. He doesn’t shy away from taking a stand on difficult issues and very clearly names gun violence as a public health issue. Under his leadership, Northwell established The Gun Violence Prevention Learning Collaborative for Health Systems and Hospitals, a grassroots initiative that gives healthcare professionals the space to have open dialogue about the impact of gun violence, share best practices and collectively take action. This piece in Becker’s Hospital Review describes his call to action – “Michael Dowling: ‘Every single US hospital leader should be screaming about what an abomination this is’”.

Arika Lycan posted on LinkedIn a piece that frames not just the murder of innocent elementary school children but all the ways that our rights are under attack – “Who is going to do something about this?!” I am, You are, We are.” Arika is a consistent voice for social justice. I am grateful to be collaborating with them and the entire CHIME Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Committee to continue to educate and raise awareness with our health IT colleagues.

We can’t let Buffalo and Uvalde move out of the news cycle and be forgotten. We need to speak up, show up, donate our time and money, and vote for candidates at all levels of government who support our values. The 2022 mid-term elections are consequential. Know what candidates stand for and vote your values. And consider volunteering some of your time to do phone / text banks for critical House and Senate races in other states.

I admit that I don’t have anything truly new to say today. I have written numerous posts after similar events rocked us to the core, and I have said it all before. So, I’m sharing my “Hate has no place” post again. If you don’t want to read it again or even for the first time – here’s my bottom-line message:

We must speak up for love and justice every chance we can. We must challenge those who hate and divide us as a people. And we must vote for the kind of leaders that we are willing to trust the future of our children and grandchildren to. Please join me.

Hate has no place (written August, 2019)

The most recent horrific mass shootings are not due to video games, the Internet, nor mental illness. There are more guns in the United States than people. Let that sink in.

Hate speech, racism, and white supremacy exist and are tolerated by some of our elected leaders who are supposed to keep us all safe. Let that sink in.

This is not who we want to be as a country. It is time for responsible, moral leaders to act. Continue reading →

Health IT content – plenty of choices

Posted by on

My recent two-week vacation included family time, Disney with grandkids, and time just chilling with girlfriends (aka pool time, my first ever pickle ball game, walks by the ocean, shopping, eating, talking and lots of laughing).  I often publish a blog each week even when I’m on vacation but not this time. It was a true break!

Now that I’m back it’s a different kind of week. I am taking care of one of my grandchildren so arranging my work schedule around her school drop-off and pickup times. Something many of you navigate seamlessly or not so seamlessly every day. I’m hoping to get it right!

I am also getting into the recording mode this week.

On May 5 at 1PM Eastern, I will be a panelist on the Well Health sponsored webinar – “Digital Transformation Post-COVID: What’s Next on the CIO Priority List?”. Meg Aranow from Well Health will be moderating the panel that also includes Joel Vengco, SVP and Chief Information & Digital Officer at Hartford HealthCare and Raymond Lowe, SVP & CIO at AltaMed Health Services. It should be a great session. You can register here.

And I’ve recorded my first show as one of the moderators on the new This Week in Health Town Hall / Community channel. I interviewed Pamela Arora, new President and CEO at AAMI and a longtime CIO colleague of mine. For all the IT leaders who listen to This Week in Health podcasts, be sure to check it out – the IT and HTM (health technology management) relationship is a critical one. Continue reading →

April reflections

Posted by on

I often write about my “big rocks” in April. This year is no exception, especially after two years of the pandemic. Spring represents a time of new life, rebirth, hope, and renewal. Yet I am always reminded that it was a sad time in my childhood. My father passed away after a 2-year battle with cancer four days before my 4th birthday. I remember the last time we saw him was in the hospital on Easter a few days earlier. He gave my sister and me popcorn Easter bunnies. A strange memory, but one of the few I have from then.

On a happier note, during these April weeks and into early May, I have milestones to celebrate – birthdays for my husband and me, our 46th wedding anniversary, and wedding anniversaries for both our adult daughters – already 12 and 8 years for them. There will be no one special celebration but plenty of opportunities to raise a glass and toast one another when we are together.  They are my biggest rocks!

This spring I’m also spending fun vacation time with family that will include a few days at Disney with two of my four grandkids. Disney with grandkids is something my husband and I have looked forward to since before we even had grandchildren. We’d joke that if we did eventually have grandchildren how old would we be when they were old enough to go to Disney, and would we still be able to do that or even want to. We were supposed to go with this family to Disney for their first time in April 2020, but we know how that worked out.

I will also be spending a week with three close girlfriends from my Michigan days. When I lived there for 3+ years, the four of us got together for long lunches every month and during the pandemic we’ve done weekly zoom calls to keep in touch. They are true friends – the kind of friends who come to help you pack your house when an ill-timed injury gets in the way of what you can do yourself. They too are my big rocks!

Do you know who your big rocks are? Do you spend enough time with them? And what do you do for yourself to renew and reboot? If you can’t easily answer these questions, I encourage you to make time so you can. Life is short.

Related Posts:

Renewal, big rocks, and the elusive work life balance

Do you know your big rocks?

Take time to reboot

Goal setting and accountability – health goals update

Posted by on

I’ve heard it said that when you share your personal goals with others, you are more apt to meet them. Something about accountability. I believe it.

 

About 8 weeks ago, I wrote “New year, new health goals, new tools” describing the excitement in our house about our new Fitbit devices and how we were motivated and ready to up our game in 2022. Happy to report that my husband and I have not lost our motivation and are still comparing our stats most days.

 

I’m averaging close to 13,000 steps or 6 miles a day. I seem to blow past the weekly zone minutes goal by Wednesday most weeks. All good!

 

But I’ve had a lot of ah-ha’s on my sleep patterns. I thought that I slept much better than I do. The sleep tracker data has helped me make some modifications. I love actionable data!

 

We plan to join the YMCA near us to get back doing weights, add more serious cardio than the long hilly walks where we live and to check out the various classes. We dropped our previous gym membership at the start of the pandemic 2 years ago. It’s time to go back.

 

While we have better routines for getting daily exercise, we know we can’t be slaves to our devices. But I admit, there are days when we get the little notification buzz on our wrist at 10 minutes to the hour reminding us that we don’t have 250 steps yet (happens hourly from 9AM – 6PM). We jump up and walk around the house until we hit it. A great reminder to get up and move – especially if I have too many back-to-back calls sitting at my desk. Continue reading →

Mentoring, role models and sometimes a little nudge

Posted by on

What a pleasant surprise to be tagged in a LinkedIn post by my daughter as she shared with her network some great professional news. She just completed her Leadership & Management Certificate Program at Wharton online. I’m super proud of her! She tagged me to thank me for the “nudge”.

I remember well our “nudge” conversation back in August. I remember it more as a conversation where she asked for advice on how best to pursue her education given her current work and how her career is evolving. She has been at the same company for the past 8 years and been promoted several times – she is now Sr. Manager, Executive Communications and Administration, partnering with the CEO and executive leadership team. I would call it more of an ask for advice and get ideas/encouragement conversation.

Her discipline and persistence to get started and finish it in just 6 months is impressive – all while working full-time and as a mother of two young children. It reminds me of when I decided to get my MBA many years ago when she and her sister were young and I had a full-time management job.

I’ve talked about my two daughters in previous posts. I try to be a role model for them professionally.  I’ve given them advice as their careers have advanced and am proud to see their accomplishments. They both have a passion for their work and have received awards for leadership and innovation. As I counsel people early in their career – find your passion, be open to the possibilities, and never stop learning.

Many women describe their mothers and grandmothers as inspiring role models. Today would be my mother’s birthday. She died just shy of her 68th birthday after a short battle with cancer. She was only 42 when my father died, leaving her to raise four young children on her own. My mother was a role model for me – a strong and independent woman. Continue reading →

New year, new health goals, new tools

Posted by on

On Tuesday, our new trackers arrived. I’ve used a Fitbit since late 2013 and still had the Fitbit One device. It served its purpose as a very basic step tracker. When it started getting less reliable during our January vacation, I decided it was time to up my game with newer tracking technology. Plus, I realized my device was discontinued a few years ago so forget about just replacing it. My husband, Tom, was ready to start more serious tracking as we focused on new health goals in 2022. He had recently downloaded a free step tracker app to his iPhone, but it was only useful if he always had his phone with him.

We carefully compared the different Fitbit devices reading specs and watching the videos. Doing the comparison shopping together on my laptop had me in tears laughing with him. Tom has never been athletic and hated gym class as a kid. We were doing the main feature compare between the Luxe and the Inspire 2. But we thought we should check out the Charge 5 before we called the question. Part way through the short video for the Charge 5, Tom said, “It’s scaring me, it’s like gym class on your wrist”. I told you, I had tears I laughed so hard at that. We each placed an order for a Luxe and the Premium Membership.

Once we had the devices charged and he downloaded the software for the first time, we quickly figured out the main features and how to navigate. We are constantly comparing our stats. I know that will wear off. But there is a new motivation in our house to get in better shape and get out walking longer distances each day. Continue reading →

End of year thoughts and advice for 2022

Posted by on

We are entering the third year of this pandemic. Vaccines have been available for over a year – a turning point we anxiously waited for as 2020 came to an end. But 2021 was not the turnaround year we had hoped for. Over 840,000 people have lost their lives in our country since the start of the pandemic – the majority of people who died of COVID since this summer were not vaccinated. Anti-vaxxers proudly proclaim their resistance and misinformation continues to spread. Our health system and healthcare workers are under incredible strain. Hospital leaders are pleading with their communities to get vaccinated and boosted.

It is hard to be optimistic at times.

Those who can continue to work remotely. Kids are in classrooms and used to wearing masks with parents and grandparents viewing school holiday concerts over Zoom. Families cautiously gathered over the holidays or changed plans at the last moment.

We crave normalcy and getting out in the world to do the things we enjoy – spending time with family and friends. live music, sports events, travel and more.

We tend to look ahead to the new year with hopes and dreams of a better year. We ask ourselves how can things get worse? We make resolutions.

David Muntz, my StarBridge Advisors colleague, recently wrote a blog post, “12 Steps to Prepare for 2022 – Big Challenges – Bigger Opportunities” that was far more than just a professional health IT perspective and advice. As this year comes to an end, I leave you with a few excerpts from his steps 1 and 12: Continue reading →

Developing next generation leaders (literally)

Posted by on

Over the course of my 35+ year career in health IT management, I have led, coached, and mentored many IT professionals. And situationally I’ve mentored my adult daughters – meaning when they ask for advice. In doing so, I have found analogies with some of my mentees and coachees who are similar ages and at a similar stage in their career.

I am always happy and proud when I see any of them grow and develop, take on new opportunities, and progress in their career. And it’s nice to hear feedback on how I’ve helped on their journey as I continue to work with others.

Now we’re at the “literal” part in this blog post’s title – next generation leaders in my own family.  Both my daughters received awards this year from their employers recognizing their contributions and leadership. My oldest daughter, Katie Killinger, MSN, BSN, NP-C, is the Chief NP of Orthopedic/Spine Surgery at Brigham and Women’s Faulkner Hospital. She received the second annual APP in Excellence Award which recognizes the important contributions Advanced Practice Providers (APPs) make to the hospital. My youngest daughter, Ann Ochiltree, works in the seafood industry and is the Sr. Manager, Executive Communications & Administration at Thai Union North America. She was recognized with the Big 6 Value Award – Innovation. I am very proud of both my daughters and love seeing the examples they are setting for their own young children.

To even mention my daughters here may be considered “parental bragging” as my husband calls it. But I mention them in a broader context of how leaders lead and influence in many different circumstances. Continue reading →

With gratitude – family says it all

Posted by on

I’m challenged to write something brand new on gratitude this Thanksgiving week even though this has been a far better year than 2020. At the same time, it has not been as positive and as “back to normal” as we had all hoped as COVID cases surged over the summer. So, I went back to my 2020 post to see how I had reflected on gratitude a year ago at a time when we weren’t gathering as families the same as we are now. I share it again here as some things haven’t changed.

We celebrated Thanksgiving with our immediate family this past Sunday at our new house. My two daughters, their husbands, and four grandkids. One of my daughters has in-laws in Florida so she and her family will travel there for the holiday. We now live within half hour of our other daughter and her in-laws live near her. We will celebrate with all of them on Thanksgiving as we have done many years in the past.

While my husband is a retired Unitarian Universalist minister, if I suggest we say something before dinner at a special family gathering, he will often pass it over to me. This year it was simple. I asked everyone to hold hands (as the grandkids wondered what I was doing) and I commented on family being together again and that I was thankful for each and every one of them as I looked each one in the eye around the table. The adults know they are my “big rocks” as Stephen Covey would describe. And someday the grandkids will understand that as well.

Being together with family says it all. I am truly grateful that we didn’t lose anyone to COVID, that we are fully vaccinated and that we can all be together again.

May you share similar love and gratitude with those closest to you this Thanksgiving 2021. As my StarBridge Advisors colleague, David Muntz, likes to say – “let the season of gratitude begin”.

Related Posts:

Treasuring family after a long year

The year we meet again

Family first

 

Never too late to make time for a break

Posted by on

Labor Day weekend is upon us. The last holiday weekend of the summer. A summer that we hoped would be more normal. One where we could enjoy vacation travel, visiting family again, and spending time with friends.

Was your summer what you expected? Did you get the break from work you needed? Did you get to see family?

Talking to my oldest daughter this morning, she described it as “the summer of yes”. She is a nurse practitioner and given what last summer was like with COVID-19, this year she was able to do short trips with her family and friends to Martha’s Vineyard, New Hampshire, and Maine.  My youngest daughter and her husband finally got to see his family in Florida taking a road trip there with their two kids.

For our first vacations since before the pandemic, my husband and I planned a long Memorial Day weekend in New York City and a 2-week vacation in California that was to include a several day visit to my Minnesota family who I hadn’t seen since October 2019. Neither trip went as expected for health reasons. Over Memorial Day weekend, we spent two of the four days in a New York City hospital after my husband had another serious medical incident. I could write Part 2 of my September post “When healthcare becomes personal” at some point – this one would be a focus on the lack of interoperability. I’m happy to say he is fine but there are still medical mysteries for us. Our California trip had to be scrapped due to my injury from a bad fall though we still visited family in Minnesota where I was able to rest and take it easy.

But I can’t complain. It is truly heartbreaking to see the current COVID-19 surge with exhausted frontline healthcare workers and so many preventable deaths of people who are unvaccinated. We all long for better times.

If you have not found time this summer to take a break, even a “staycation” if you’re concerned about safe travel, or quality time with family, I hope you can find time in the coming weeks. I have written in the past about the importance of finding time to reboot, putting family first, and prioritizing self-care. Now more than ever we all need it.

Related Posts:

Take time to reboot

Renewal, big rocks, and the elusive work life balance

The 6 Rs of summer