My husband and I recently had the joy of our first ever “Nana Camp” – four days with our four grandkids ages 6-9 at our house. One family is two girls ages 9 and 7. The other family is a 7 year old girl and 6 year old boy. I have been talking with my daughters about doing nana camp since I reduced my work hours this year making more time for family.

We now live in a townhouse in Plymouth, Massachusetts, with a couple swimming pools in our development, nearby beaches, and history rich field trip opportunities. A perfect setting for nana camp! Not until we were on our field trips (Plimouth Patuxet Museums including the Patuxet Homesite, 17th-Century English Village, Mayflower II and Plimoth Grist Mill) did I realize they have missed school field trips the past few years due to the pandemic which made these outings even more special.

After the four cousins spent July 4^th together, my two daughters and I came up with the framework for nana camp rules which started a few days later. The first night they were all here, I had the kids write out the rules and post them on the refrigerator door. Just the act of writing them together tested some of the rules. It was their idea to each sign the rules like a contract.

Don’t get me wrong, all four of them are awesome and well behaved but get them all together and there’s bound to be what we later described as “silly fights”. So much so that on the last day we joked about making silly fight badges for them and how many they would all get.

Siblings have their day-to-day routines at home, but all four cousins together can disrupt that. Arguing and jostling over who takes the first shower at night, which row they get in the mini-van, who gets to walk the dogs first – you get the idea. The oldest had an astute observation a few days later when we had just her and her sister here for a short mini-camp. With just two of them they didn’t need to have silly fights – there were two showers to use so both could be first, there were only two kid seats in our car so front vs back row wasn’t a fight, and there were two dogs to walk.

These were the rules we agreed on with “be safe and have fun” underlying them:

1. Be kind
2. Be inclusive
3. Respect privacy
4. Work it out
5. Clean up after yourself
6. Let others sleep

Kindness should go without saying but in a period where we see so much bullying in our society, we must emphasize it. For these kids it was ensuring silly fights didn’t turn into mean words. Inclusiveness is critical to teach on so many levels. For these kids it was about taking turns and not excluding someone from a game or activity. Respect privacy meant if someone needed alone time, let them have it. Work it out meant don’t come tattling to us – try to work it out themselves. We learned over the days that these rules could conflict with one another and that there were times when they needed adults to help them work things out together. Continue reading →